Future In Your Hand
Yes, we always have questions in our mind of how and when of so many things and we're really looking forward to know. Just like my uber complicated life, im goin to graduate next year. I really wanna finish my study a.s.a.p!! Yeahhhhh im still confuse within two career path... I cant decide yet and I prioritize them all. I love the design world, but in the same time I still wanna prove that I can make a living through music too, especially in the Indonesian music scene. Today Im full with tears, had convo with dad and mom through blackberry messenger, talked about this and that, fear of me being a jobless girl which is a big no no please! After these years passed on i havent prove my existence and significant growth through my music life. So many problems and hard chances. But im not gonna give up im still workin it out till now. Well they thought i moved here to study because of that but actually no! Im studying graphic design and i know there will be much more opportunities, network and better design education here in Singapore. They're really looking forward for me to work here or another country, as long as still abroad.
I dont mind but i cant lie, inside my heart it's still there, my music natural sense. Music career, music business, even my plan to create a design-related business at Indonesia.......... I just dont wanna leave them as rubbish!! So Allah, let them know that Im able to handle this and being responsible of my career life. Im optimist everything gonna work out as long as you're really motivated and willing to get the dreams! yes I do believe in miracle. I cried.
So many opportunities i havent be able to do so. I will be back to Indonesia with a broader mind, with a better perspective, better attitude and of course more experiences. I'll keep my music nature inside and still trying to realize these dreams, people said rubbish but all are precious for me no such thing bad for creativity yes I know...............
Things didnt worked out really well as expected in seven years of my music life. But I will change this, so be passion mom, dad......
I will do both, graphic design and music. Im still Bella, a proud Indonesian girl whos know struggling abroad away from home to get a degre and to be back with a great knowledge. I sacrificed time, a lot. Homesick? Nope but I miss my social life and my misic routines honestly. Im all alone here. Not so much friends as im a transfer student and i'll finish college next year and people already formed their own social groups. I doesnt fit in and theyre more individualist if you compare with indo people. Thats why expat loves indonesia, they said indonesian peole are nice and humble. True fact. I felt that.
Hm too much over writing? Sumimasen, but i write when im feeling bad or confuse. Usually I'll find a super solution through this so Im writing these words now. Hope everything gonna work out great for everyone （＾∇＾）
Xoxo
Bella Mazaya
I dont mind but i cant lie, inside my heart it's still there, my music natural sense. Music career, music business, even my plan to create a design-related business at Indonesia.......... I just dont wanna leave them as rubbish!! So Allah, let them know that Im able to handle this and being responsible of my career life. Im optimist everything gonna work out as long as you're really motivated and willing to get the dreams! yes I do believe in miracle. I cried.
So many opportunities i havent be able to do so. I will be back to Indonesia with a broader mind, with a better perspective, better attitude and of course more experiences. I'll keep my music nature inside and still trying to realize these dreams, people said rubbish but all are precious for me no such thing bad for creativity yes I know...............
Things didnt worked out really well as expected in seven years of my music life. But I will change this, so be passion mom, dad......
I will do both, graphic design and music. Im still Bella, a proud Indonesian girl whos know struggling abroad away from home to get a degre and to be back with a great knowledge. I sacrificed time, a lot. Homesick? Nope but I miss my social life and my misic routines honestly. Im all alone here. Not so much friends as im a transfer student and i'll finish college next year and people already formed their own social groups. I doesnt fit in and theyre more individualist if you compare with indo people. Thats why expat loves indonesia, they said indonesian peole are nice and humble. True fact. I felt that.
Hm too much over writing? Sumimasen, but i write when im feeling bad or confuse. Usually I'll find a super solution through this so Im writing these words now. Hope everything gonna work out great for everyone （＾∇＾）
Xoxo
Bella Mazaya
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